Enkindle Wellness

Category: Health and Wellness

  • Compassion: The Less You Suffer, the Kinder You Naturally Become.

     

    by Byron Katie

    Some people think that compassion means feeling another person’s pain. That’s nonsense. It’s not possible to feel another person’s pain. You imagine what you’d feel if you were in that person’s shoes, and you feel your own projection. Who would you be without your story? Pain-free, happy, and totally available if someone needs you — a listener, a teacher in the house, a Buddha in the house, the one who lives it. As long as you think there’s a you and a me, let’s get the bodies straight. What I love about separate bodies is that when you hurt, I don’t — it’s not my turn. And when I hurt, you don’t. Can you be there for me without putting your own suffering between us? Your suffering can’t show me the way. Suffering can only teach suffering.

    The Buddhists say that it’s important to recognize the suffering in the world, and that’s true, of course. But if you look more deeply, even that is a story. It’s a story to say that there is any suffering in the world. Suffering is imagined, because we haven’t adequately questioned our thoughts. I am able to be present with people in extreme states of torment without seeing their suffering as real. I’m in the position of being totally available to help them see what I see, if that’s what they want. They’re the only ones who can change, but I can be present, with kind words and the power of inquiry.

    It’s amazing how many people believe that suffering is a proof of love. If I don’t suffer when you suffer, they think, it means that I don’t love you. How can that possibly be true? Love is serene; it’s fearless. If you’re busy projecting what someone’s pain must feel like, how can you be fully present with her? How can you hold her hand and love her with all your heart as she moves through her experience of pain? Why would she want you to be in pain, too? Wouldn’t she rather have you present and available? You can’t be present for people if you believe that you’re feeling their pain.

    Sadness is always a sign that you’re believing a stressful thought that isn’t true for you. It’s a constriction, and it feels bad. Conventional wisdom says differently, but the truth is that sadness isn’t rational, it isn’t a natural response, and it can’t ever help you. It just indicates the loss of reality, the loss of the awareness of love. Sadness is the war with what is. It’s a tantrum. You can experience it only when you’re arguing with God. When the mind is clear, there isn’t any sadness. There can’t be.

    If you move into situations of loss in a spirit of surrender to what is, all you experience is a profound sweetness and an excitement about what can come out of the apparent loss. And once you question the mind, once the stressful story is seen for what it is, there’s nothing you can do to make it hurt. You see that the worst loss you’ve experienced is the greatest gift you can have. When the story arises again — “She shouldn’t have died” or “He shouldn’t have left” — it’s experienced with a little humour, a little joy. Life is joy, and if you understand the illusion arising, you understand that it’s you arising, as joy.

    You don’t have to feel bad to act kindly. On the contrary: The less you suffer, the kinder you naturally become. And if compassion means wanting others to be free of suffering, how can you want for others what you won’t give to yourself?

    The end of suffering happens in this very moment, whether you’re watching a terrorist attack or doing the dishes. And compassion begins at home. Because I don’t believe my thoughts, sadness can’t exist. That’s how I can go to the depths of anyone’s suffering, if they invite me, and take them by the hand and walk them out of it into the sunlight of reality. I’ve taken the walk myself.

    I’ve heard people say that they cling to their painful thoughts because they’re afraid that without them they wouldn’t be activists for peace. “If I felt completely peaceful,” they say, “why would I bother taking action at all?” My answer is, “Because that’s what love does.” To think that we need sadness or outrage to motivate us to do what’s right is insane. As if the clearer and happier you get, the less kind you become. As if when someone finds freedom, she just sits around all day with drool running down her chin. My experience is the opposite. Love is action. It’s clear, it’s kind, it’s effortless, and it’s irresistible.

    This article, written by Byron Katie, was published in The Huffington Post and can be found at Compassion: The Less You Suffer, the Kinder You Naturally Become. For more about Byron Katie go the her website The Work by Byron Katie.

  • Core Strength – Questioning the Prevailing Beliefs

    There has been much emphasis on the concept of building core strength over recent years; it’s a concept that is incomplete to me. I see the key issue is actually core energy not core strength: I will explain.

    The “core” refers to the lower part of the body: the pelvis, the lower back, the abdominal wall, and the diaphragm, and this region’s ability to stabilise the body during movement. Every activity we do in life, from running to swallowing, is more efficient when we have a stable and yet flexible core. It’s a dynamic stability that involves a balance of movement and strength of our connective tissue: our bones, muscles, ligaments, tendons and the matrix of connective tissue that interconnects them.

    It’s more about how you can use your energy than about your strength.

    Try sitting in a slouched position and taking a sip of a drink and swallowing, notice your inner feelings. Next sit in an upright and relaxed posture (engaging your core) and have another sip. Observe the difference in how you feel between the two postures. While you may feel stronger and more energetic (and perhaps that the drink “went down” better) in the upright posture, you didn’t strengthen your core but simply used its current strength more efficiently. That is, it was more about energy than strength.

    Because the core muscles and other connective tissue components are being used every day to maintain posture and for activities – sitting, walking, breathing, digesting etc.; they are already as strong as they need to be. My experience is that when people are told that they have a lack of core strength (“a weak core”), the problem isn’t weakness in their core muscles but the fact that these muscles and other aspects of the connective tissue matrix are too tight!

    It is a fact that a tight core is weaker than a core that is relaxed.

    It is a fact that a tight core is weaker than a core that is relaxed. Many people advising on exercise recommend exercises to “strengthen the core”. There are two problems with this: putting exercise strain on already tight muscles causes them to become even tighter and it focuses on the muscles when the main restriction may well be in the connective tissue matrix.

    Muscle building exercises put more stress into the core and can increase the stresses on other pelvic and abdominal structures, e.g. vertebral discs and the pelvic and abdominal organs. This can have a negative effect on the function of these organs and discs. Stress or trauma can become even more embedded when working these already tight tissues.

    So how do the core muscles become too tight?

    So how do the core muscles become too tight? These muscles and the rest of the connective tissue matrix react strongly (often without people noticing) to the stresses we experience throughout our lives. The cause of the stresses can be physical, emotional, mental or chemical.

    Think of what happens to the muscles in your pelvic region when you have a sudden fear. Try it: tense your body in the way you would if you were experiencing fear and notice the parts of body where you feel that tension. For most people the tension is mainly noticed in the upper body, neck and shoulders. Tense your body again and take particular notice of the way the deep muscles in your abdomen and pelvis tighten. This lower body tightening is often not noticed by the person experiencing the stress.

    So how can we release this deep set tension? Rather than putting more effort into an already “stuck” core (there is high energy stuck there that we cannot access) with strengthening exercises, we need to use methods to connect to and relax the tension.

    The Network Chiropractic and Matrix Repatterning techniques that I use are an efficient and effective way to achieve that release and gain the extra energy and better body and organ function that is denied because of deep tension.

    As this release occurs you will be able to further improve the dynamic stability of your core with Pilates and yoga sessions and other forms of exercise. Meditation is another component to making the connections you desire to enhance your energy and posture. As the result of these changes you will also experience benefits in other aspects of your  life.

  • “Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change.”

    “Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change.”

     ~ Dr Wayne Dyer

    Dr Dyer’s quote invokes the famous double slit experiment in physics. When scientists look, on a microscopic level, at a light beam passing through a pair of slits in a panel, their observation of the experiment changes the behaviour of the light beam from either a wave (movement of energy) to a particle (movement of particles) or vice versa. This is in the area of quantum physics, where science is not only stranger than you think; it is stranger than you can think.
    Our health is an example of something that can change as a result of the way in which it is observed. I’d argue that there are significantly different outcomes for our health depending on how one looks at it.

    The mechanical view dominates our society’s understanding of how our bodies function. This view tends to see the body in terms of its separate parts, albeit working together; and specialises in focussing on a specific part of the body when faced with a crisis. This view is reflected in our medical system.

    Alternatively, there is the wholistic view, which includes the mechanistic approach but adds a broader, more interconnected interpretation of how our bodies work.  Emotional, mental, social and environmental aspects are included in a wholistic perspective of health.  A wholistic understanding of health doesn’t “throw out” the mechanical view as there useful parts to this approach that can be included within the wholistic view.

    A good illustration of the differences in the two approaches is the way we look at our bones.

    Do you think of your skeleton as a whole lot of bones joined together, or a dynamic structure giving form and strength?

    After looking at an image, a medical practitioner would commonly diagnose “arthritis”, and would suggest that any pain experienced comes from the condition of the bones as seen in the x-ray. This interpretation reflects a mechanistic view.

    However, if we regard the body as a responsive, adaptable system we can describe what is shown in the same x-ray as follows:

    • there have been stresses that have impacted on this area of the spine
    • the stress may have occurred through an injury
    • the stress has a postural component and relates to other stresses – mental, emotional, nutritional (poor nutrition or the body’s response to toxicity.)

    Importantly, what appears on the x-ray relates to many aspects of one’s life and not just the bones in one’s neck.

    There is no scientific evidence of the presence of spinal degeneration seen on x-ray correlating with the patient’s pain or other symptoms.

    Judging from the x-ray, I would also suggest that the body has “done its best” to cope with the stresses in the neck. In fact, it is the body’s response to stress which has led to the diagnosis of “arthritis”, manifesting as pain.

    Looking at the same x-ray from a wholistic perspective, the observations change:

    • increased density of the bone around the joints is the body’s way of strengthening a weakness (seen as more whiteness on x-ray)
    • bone spurs – which are actually ligaments containing extra calcium which the body deposits to give strength and stability to a stressed joint.
    • disc narrowing and reduced movement – which has the effect of providing more protection to the spinal cord than a thicker, unstable disc.

    These things are the body’s way of adjusting (positively) to the negative effects of stress.

    The two different interpretations of the same x-ray provide choices about the way we look at ourselves and our health. The mechanistic view tends sees limited options for change as the “arthritis” is something that is immovably set in place. with relief coming from the outside in the form of medication. The wholistic model suggests our bodies (and our whole selves) have the ability to take control, learn, adapt and create change from within.

    The wholistic view includes the mechanistic view but adds the knowledge that “arthritis” reflects more than what appears in the image on an x-ray.

    A wholistic approach encourages a view of health from a wider perspective – one that embraces change – changing the way we look at things and in turn changing the way we choose to live.

  • Embodiment

    When we desensitize ourselves to our body, we tend to associate knowledge and wisdom only with our thinking mind. We try to think our way through life, giving ourselves a break from our minds every now and then by drugging ourselves, getting erotic, or otherwise using the body as a tool for distraction. Our bodies get so easily saturated with our mental activity—if someone asks us how we’re feeling, many of us tend to look up or away, scanning through our mind for the answer. As if the mind knows!

    Getting back to the body not only speeds our healing, anchoring and centring us, it also helps decentralise egoity so that we become more than embodied ego and its imperialistic holdings. Getting back to the body isn’t about having ego-governed relationships with our different “parts”—part of me wants this, part of me wants that, and another part of me doesn’t want either, and so on, revealing not healthy ambiguity but only self-fragmentation. Getting back to the body is about having a being-centred relationship with all that constitutes us.

    Our body is our medium for being in relationship with our environment (a physical body for a physical environment, a dream body for a dream environment, and so on). But embodiment is relationship. As we mature, we shift from sensing our body as a solid something to sensing it as something far from static, something through which we are revealed and expressed, no matter in what state we may be.

    When lost in thought, we have no body.

    When attention is brought to thought, we have a body.

    When attention is brought to sensation, we shift from having a body to being in a body.

    When attention is brought to perception, we shift from being in a body to being present as a body.

    When attention is brought to our overall presence, our innate wholeness of being, we shift from being present as a body to simply being, neither separate from nor identified with our body.

    By Robert Augustus Masters

    http://robertmasters.com/

  • How Did the Diplodocus Hold its Head Up?

    You may experience some neck tension with stress and prolonged sitting at the computer, driving or working at a bench. But think of the poor old Diplodocus, how did they manage to hold their heads up with a 7 metre long neck?  They didn’t have a tall frame on their shoulders and the cables that we see holding up the long boom of the cranes on high-rise building sites.

    The Diplodocus used a wonderful structural design which is actually the structural basis of all life forms. It is the structure of all parts of us from our DNA to our cells to our organs to our bones, muscles and nerves.  It’s called the tensegrity matrix.

    The term tensegrity (“tension” + “integrity”) was coined by Buckminster Fuller (best known for the geodesic dome). Use of a tensegrity design creates a structure with the strength, stability, and flexibility far greater than would be expected of its individual parts.

    In plants and animals the matrix is the material that forms the structure of every part, from within the individual cells to the whole plant or animal. It is the tissue that supports, connects, binds together and transmits information.

    This is a vastly different model from the conventional understanding of the body as a skeleton clothed in muscle and skin.

    The Diplodocus’ very long and flexible neck, able to move in all directions and support its head, was due to its tensegrity structure rather than the lever and pulley system we see in a building crane.

    The tensegrity model explains how cells and the whole body can move and respond to forces from the outside and forces within. It also utilises the body’s energy and nutrients to remain strong and flexible. It is known as the tensegrity matrix.

    When we look at our body as a whole, the matrix is made up of connective tissues. Connective tissue consists of cells and fibres which weave their way throughout our bodies surrounding our brain, organs, bones, muscles and nerves. Connective tissue also includes: bones, cartilage, tendons, ligaments, fat tissue and blood and lymph systems.

     

    In addition, the matrix has specific structural and electrical properties that respond to changes to its tension and shape. These changes have been shown to have a significant effect on everything from the function of individual cells to the function of the whole body. In humans, these changes can have a dramatic influence on health and wellness.

    The tensegrity matrix is amazingly resilient and flexible, allowing us to perform all kinds of activities – from simple bending to gymnastics. It is even capable of bouncing back into shape after significant forces are applied it. But there is a limit – sometimes the forces are too strong for our structure to absorb.

    Trauma, as the result of a physical injury or from mental/emotional stress, results in a change in tension and shape of the matrix. This causes a region of the body to become more rigid and have a decreased flow of energy (electrical charge). This isn’t always experienced as local pain, but as the rigidity continues it can result in pain and stiffness in other parts of the body that are connected via the matrix.

    The techniques I use are designed to release tension in the tensegrity matrix. Positive changes to this matrix are more likely to occur with a very gentle specific contact than with a forceful one, because a forceful contact may cause the matrix to go further in a rigid protective mode. With the release of tension there is a greater flow of energy throughout the body causing increased strength and flexibility and improved function of organs, the brain and nervous system, the blood and lymph systems and the digestive system.

  • “I’m Stuck”

    It’s great when people come to see me and say they are “stuck” or “blocked” in some aspect of their body or their life. This is because realising you are stuck is the point at which moving forward is possible.

    “It seems as if I keep making progress then I hit a barrier, I feel like I’m running around in circles, I’ve tried EVERTHING, it’s SO FRUSTRATING!”

    If you think of something, it could be a pain (or any other aspect of your life), that you are experiencing (or have experienced in the past) a feeling of being stuck or blocked; observe the feeling that you “have tried everything.” And you probably have indeed tried lots of things, often treatments that are designed to “fix” the problem.

    These treatments will usually give symptomatic relief and psychological relief because a “professional” has told you they have found the source of your symptoms and given it a name (a diagnosis).  I’m not saying this is “bad” because it can be crucial and lifesaving.  But it is also the reason that our health care system fails many of the people who suffer chronic diseases and pain.

    When you are focused on and are receiving treatments aimed at “fixing” the problem you may get relief, but you continually dissipate the energy that is required to bring about real change. I know about this because I spent 20 years as a manual chiropractor, with the best of intentions based on my understanding at that time: trying to “fix” people’s problems. (Not to mention trying to “fix” my own problems.) I finally realised that I was only helping people to stay stuck in a “holding pattern” where they got relief from their symptoms (e.g. their headache) for a short period of time then the headache would come back because nothing had changed in their life.

    Fortunately there was the occasional person who did move out of that holding pattern and I noticed that these people often, not only resolved their symptom pattern but told me about changes they had made in their life – “changed my whole diet”, “left the job I hated” etc. These people inspired me to search for a way of working where I could help people break through their stuckness and achieve more of what they want to do in their lives. This is what I do now.

    Life creates layers of blockages within us. These blockages originally occur at times of stress, often when we are young and have a lesser ability to cope than an adult. These blockages are not bad things when they originally occur as they help us to be safe and to cope. Later in adult life they come out as symptoms and a restriction in our ability to be who we are capable of being. It is a lifelong process of clearing these blockages.

    When a person realises and expresses that they are stuck then the energy for change is available.

    Say out loud, with conviction; “I’M STUCK!!!”.

    Notice the energy that arises in saying this and a sense, in the background, that there is a spark of possibility that change can occur. Once that spark has occurred there is energy for change and my “work” can help you use that energy to move forward in the aspect of your life that is blocked.

    Once the energy for change is set free, you may find yourself wanting to say “Enough of this”, “I’m drawing a line in the sand”, or “I have a plan and I’m moving forward.” The energy that was bound up in the blockage is now flowing and creating real change.